Should I keep my guard up or should I go in full stride?

Heart, chained

Heart, chained: Andrea R Flickr CC

by: Darlene Charles

In “How to Let Your Guard Down,” Nea talks about why and why not someone should keep their guard down, what is the importance of it, and how to do it. She states:

Having your guard up is the equivalent of putting bars and chains on the windows of your house.  The intent is to keep the bad guys out, but what about the price you pay for this protection?

The price you pay is not letting a male get to know all of you and if you let your guard down, you’re risking the chance of getting to know someone and having someone by your side that you will grow to trust and maybe love.

We often enter relationships scared or with an open heart. For females, it’s often with an open heart. We want a trusting relationship, but often, we end up sabotaging the relationship ourselves.

Yes, you’re scared because you don’t want to get hurt, but the real matter is you rather break someone’s heart before they break yours. Like Nea says, “The most common excuse for keeping the guard up is to avoid getting hurt.” If you feel like things are getting too deep, he’s becoming attached, you automatically run straight for the door without even thinking about it. You would rather have the satisfaction of being in control of the situation. However, is this the ideal strategy for building the life-long romance you desire?

Females who are in relationships with their guards up are limiting the male’s feelings as well as the male getting to know all of her. She holds a reserved section of her heart in which the male has no access to. She is scared that if her heart becomes emotionally attached to this male and things go sour, her heart will be broken. So before the male can break her heart, she breaks his. By keeping her guard up, she lets the guy taste a piece of what she can offer, but at the end of the day she still puts up a fence. She can only trust herself, her own instincts, rather than placing all her butterflies, gushy feelings, and most importantly, her heart to this male she is seeing.

On the other hand, there are females who go into a relationship with an open heart who have never experienced a relationship before. We call them fresh fish, newbies, immature, and often open-minded. They go through their first everything and they either end up having the time of their lives with this male, or things turn sour. These types of females are willing to go through it all, but females who have undergone it all, tend to keep it safe, simple, and to the point.


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