Thanks, Mom

By Jeremy Scanlon

Jackie MacMullan really understands men. In her latest article, “Take a Deep Breath, Patriots Fans” she comforts the New England faithful by going into great detail as to why the New York Giants were simply a better team and earned the victory. How Eli and Manningham made the big play that Brady and Welker couldn’t, and everything else that went wrong:

“Curse Bill Belichick for his team’s mind-boggling confusion in the opening minutes of the game! Curse 12 men on the field! Curse the secondary for not picking off Eli Manning at least once! Curse Vince Wilfork for not playing like the Incredible Hulk again! Curse Aaron Hernandez for dropping that ball over the middle on the final drive! Curse Dan Koppen for breaking his ankle in September! Curse Stephen Neal for retiring last spring! Curse Kevin Faulk for having the audacity to be inactive! Curse them all!!”

Really, Jackie? This is what you’re going to go with? The rational approach? You want us to look at the big picture? Put in perspective? Calm down? It takes more than two days to get over a broken heart.

Here’s everything wrong with her. I mean, her article:

  1. How she managed to not only mention every painful moment of that game in one article, but also think that was a good idea is beyond me.
  2. Us fans aren’t even close to the think-about-it-rationally stage. We’re still in denial. Until this article, I forgot there was even a game on Sunday.
  3. Did she think she was writing for ESPN New York?
  4. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Stick to basketball, Jackie, where what you talk about doesn’t matter anyways.

She’s made herself look dumb on several other occasions. Here are two:

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